Funny Essays to Teach in Composition

I want to do an essay on chronology and hand it in late...

... so the professor can say "it's about time!"

"How long should my essay be?"

Back in high school I was in an english class and a fellow student asked the teacher how long our essays should be.

He responded saying, "As long as a girl's skirt: long enough to cover everything that needs to be covered, but short enough to keep me interested."

What did the Mexican say when a gust of wind blew his homework out the window?

Come back essay!

What do you call a little Mexican?

A paragraph, because he's not quite an essay.

What does the US Government use to spy on a high school student?

An essay.

Why did the coed have sex with a Mexican?

Her professor told her if she wanted to pass, she had to do an essay

An essay is like a girl's skirt...

It should be long enough to cover the important parts, but short enough to still be interesting.

Why did the 14 year old Mexican girl end up pregnant?

Because her teacher told her to go do an essay.

For school I had to write a thousand word essay

So I drew a picture

Russian kids were writing an essay about their heroes....

..... The title was: "Who is your hero and why Stalin?"

Why was Civil Disobedience such a good essay?

Thoreau editing.

You can explore essay linguistics reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean essay paragraph dad jokes. There are also essay puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

I'm using my computer to write an essay about Bugs Bunny.

The filename is whatsup.doc

My English teacher got really angry about the format of my essay.

It wasn't justified.

So the essay portion of the SATs will be dropped in 2016...

I guess we'll just have to call them the Ts.

Apparently they're removing the essay section from the SAT

Now it's just going to be called the T.

I am getting around to writing my essay on herbs for my botany class...

It's about thyme

What did the mexican student say when he was asked to turn in his essay?

I ain't no snitch.

I wrote an essay about American Patriotism

Then I pointed at it and started shouting ' You Essay! You Essay!'

Why did the Latino girl come to class pregnant?

Her teacher told her to do an essay.

My history teacher is a communist, so I made lots of references to the Soviet Union in my essay.

I got full marx.

What do you call a Spanish midget?

A paragraph.

Because he's not a full essay.

I wrote a college paper about government agencies slowly encroaching on internet privacy.

It's called "NSA: An Essay."

Did you hear they removed the essay portion from the SAT?

Now it's just called the T

"My night's about to get better now that you're turned on."

... said the student to his printer when he finished his essay.

I told my Mexican student to turn in his essay

He said "I ain't no snitch!".

Why did the Mexican fail English 101?

He wouldn't turn in his essay

I wanted to get into the right mood for my essay about american patriotism..

so i shouted at my essay "You Essay", "You Essay", "YOU ESSAY"

What did the Mexican say when his homework flew out the window?

Where you going essay!?

What's the most assigned elementary school essay in Chicago?

"What I want to be *IF* I grow up"

I paid a Mexican to finish my Spanish essay.

He found me the next day and said that the problem was taken care of. "So, can I see my essay?" I asked. The Mexican took me to the hospital. My friend, Ricardo, was dead.

professor gave us a 2000 word essay...

So I gave him two pictures.

What does the Mexican kid say as his homework flys out of the window?

Ayyee essay, where are you going?

An English class is writing an essay

One of the students asks how long the essay should be.
The teacher responds, "Like a skirt. Long enough to cover the subject, but short enough to keep me interested".

I fell in love while starting my essay.

It was love at first cite.

I had to write an essay on plagiarism today

I couldn't think of anything so I just copied the guy sitting next to me

How did the mexican girl get pregnant?

The teacher told her to make an essay.

I finally got an A on my essay!

Only 1999 more words to go.

50% of essays

Is the letter 's'.

An essay should be like a skirt.

Long enough to cover everything but short enough to keep your attention.

How does a pig write an essay?

With a pen and oink.

I'm pretty sure someone stole the last paragraph of my essay, and hid it on a really high shelf...

But I don't want to jump to conclusions.

Not original, and not sure if it's been posted before, but it made me chuckle and thought I'd share.

I was asked to submit a 1,000 word essay..

So I just submitted a picture instead.

My professor wanted me to write an essay on existentialism...

So I passed in a blank sheet of paper

A college class was asked to write a short story in as few words as possible.

A college class was asked to write a short story in as few words as possible.

The only catch was the story had to include three subjects:

1: Religion

2: Sexuality

3: Mystery

Below is the only A* essay.

"Good god, I'm pregnant. I wonder who did it."

My teacher told me to turn in my essay

But I ain't no snitch

A university creative writing class was asked to write a concise essay containing these four elements: religion, royalty, sex and mystery.

The prize-winning essay read, "My God," said the Queen, "I'm pregnant. I wonder whose it is?"

What do you call a Mexican midget?

A paragraph because he's too short to be an essay

What do you call a Spanish midget?

A paragraph. He's just too small to be an Essay.

Why was the pig late turning in his college essay?

His printer was out of oink.

Why did the Mexican teenager get pregnant?

...her teacher told her to go home and do her essay.

My religious studies professor assigned an essay about the last days of Christ.

I totally nailed it.

I did an essay on The Room.

For school, I had to write an essay based on a film, so I decided to do it on "The Room". I think I did well, because I got a hi mark.

An essay by lil Johnny

The composition teacher asked the class to write about an unusual event that happened during the past week. Little Johnny got up and read his essay.
It began, "Daddy fell into the well last week..."

"My goodness!" the teacher exclaimed. "Is he all right?"

"He must be," said the boy. "He stopped yelling for help yesterday."

My teacher asked me to submit a 1,000 word essay, but I couldn't be bothered...

So I handed in a picture instead...

I'm pretty sure someone hid the last paragraph of my essay on a shelf that I can't reach,

But I don't want to jump to conclusions.

Three kids walk into a classroom...

The White girl enters. The teacher says "Do an essay", and the girl is finished in 45 minutes

The Asian girl enters. The teacher says "Do an essay", and the girl is finished in 35 minutes

The Mexican girl enters. The teacher says "Do an essay", and the girl is finished in 5 minutes

My computer just crashed while I was a couple hours into doing my essay

Now I have to write those two sentences all over again

I did really well on my essay about communism.

People think they're funny by asking "did you get high Marx?" Actually, I did well because I approached the topic from all Engels.

A man failed his gay Latino literature gang initiaton

He didn't do his essay

How does a pirate open an essay?

With a hook.

My health science teacher told me to write a 1,000 word essay on drugs

The paper became a taco and the floor was melting.

Your essays should be like a girls skirt

Long enough to cover the subject, short enough to keep it interesting and on the desk by Friday midnight.

A teacher asked her students to write an essay about " what would I do if I were CEO of a company"

She notices one of the kids is just looking out the window. So she askes him "Why are you not writing your essay?"

He answers :"I'm waiting for my secretary to come and type it for me"

I think I have a fetish for the last paragraph in an essay

I just came to that conclusion

An English teacher asked her class to write an essay on what they'd do if they had a million dollars.

5 minutes before the bell, Bob handed in a blank sheet of paper. "Bob!" yelled the teacher. "You've done nothing. Why?"

"Because if I had a million dollars, that's exactly what I would do."

What do u call a little Mexican?

A Paragraph because he's not quite an Essay yet.

My Spanish teacher asked me to turn in my essay

But I ain't no snitch

The teacher had asked the class to write an essay about an unusual event that happened during the past week.

Little Johnny got up to read his.

It began, "My daddy fell in a well last week."

"Good Lord!" the teacher exclaimed. "Is he OK?"

"He must be," said Little Johnny. "He stopped calling for help yesterday."

My teacher told me to hand over my essay

But I don't snitch on my homies

The teacher asked the class to write an essay about an unusual event that happened during the past week. Little Johnny got up to read his. It began, "My daddy fell in a well last week." "Good grief!" the teacher exclaimed. "Is he OK?" "He must be," said Little Johnny.

"He stopped calling for help yesterday

The teacher told his Mexican student to turn in his essay...

To which he replied, "Nah, man. I ain't no snitch."

My chemistry teacher told me I had to write a 1,000 word essay on acid.

Unfortunately, my pen turned into a gorilla and the floor melted.

What do you call a long piece of writing about America?

A U essay

Why did the Mexican fail his writing class?

Because he refused to turn in his essay!

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